Does this sound familiar?
You've made a big transition in your life. You've made big changes. They're sticking. You feel awesome.
Your new way of living feels comfortable and safe - no longer scary or impossible - and you dig it.
You like who you've become.
And somehow, in the back of your mind, you have this sneaking fear that the person you left behind [those habits you gave up; the thought patterns you worked hard to break; the limited, unhappy, unhealthy physical body you no longer live in] might reemerge at any minute? A fear that you never actually left that behind or 'got over it'?
And then you have those days when the universe gives you incredible proof that you are absolutely the person you thought you would never become? Proof that you have moved past the stuff that held you back? Proof that you know too much and have worked too hard to let yourself relapse to where you once were?
I see the people I work with experience this every week, and it makes me so happy.
Today was one of those days for me.
I'm diving - literally - into training for the NY Triathlon this week, which will take place in August. I am wildly excited and really stoked to be running for Team Braking AIDS for Housing Works, an incredible non-profit in the city. (Check out more details - and why I'm running for them - here.) It's been a couple of years since my last triathlon, so I was a little hesitant about jumping back in. The week began with a 10km run [race distance], which felt pretty darn good. Today was my first day back in the pool in over 18 months... eek. I was so worried it would be a disaster: I envisioned a lot of gasping and sputtering and a ton of breaks.
In fact, none of this was the case! I actually swam the fastest 1500m I have ever done before - 23:00, what!! I say this not to be really self-congratulatory, but to share this experience of feeling convinced - perhaps once and for all!? - that I am not the person I used to be. It's been a long time in the making, but it takes mornings like this sometimes for me to believe I am no longer the overweight, unhappy, unfit person I spent the first 18 years of my life as. I can swim 1500m in 23:00 minutes without training. Without stopping. Without nearly drowning. Huh. Cool.
I say this to share the power of accomplishing something you set your mind to. When we commit fiercely to what we want - for me, it's health and strength and the capacity to take on whatever the universe throws my way - there is no reason we can't achieve and maintain it. If you have a big enough 'why' behind what you do, it will keep you going, even if it feels like it's taking a long time to arrive. Just wait until that moment you realize you are officially, irrevocably the kind of person you never imagined you would be.
It's awesome. I wish you all the success that can be had!
And hey, in the meantime, why not try this delicious workout refuel smoothie? It's a little twist on a peanut butter + honey sandwich (remember those?!), although there is no honey or peanut butter in here.
Peanut Butter + Honey Smoothie 2.0
1/4 cup flax meal
2 tbsp peanuts
1 tsp bee pollen
1 tsp hemp seeds
1/4 cup water
1 1/4 cups almond milk
1 tsp coconut oil
1 scoop brown rice protein powder (I'm trying out the RAW brand yerba mate flavor this week)
Blend. Sip. Refuel.